As a Sleep Consultant, one of the most common sleep issues that I support parents with is frequent night waking.
If you’re in this boat at the moment, please let me reassure you that you’re not alone. A recent study by Prof. Amy Brown at Swansea University found that 78% of babies between the ages of 6-12 months regularly woke at least once in the night, with 61% having at least one milk feed during the night.
So, night waking is definitely normal - according to this study, babies under 12 months who sleep through the night are in the minority. However, as a parent, there’s a difference between being woken once or twice, and being woken 6 billion times every. single. night.
Getting by on a small amount of broken sleep night after night, month upon month isn’t sustainable forever. Everyone has their limit.
Sleep is multifacted, and there’s no ‘one-size-fits-all’ approach that’s going to improve things for everyone. However, there are some comon culprits that are known to affect sleep.
In this blog, I describe 5 of the biggest cuplrits behind frequent night waking, and some gentle ways that you can help optimise sleep for your child.
1) Over tiredness
If your child isn’t sleep well at night, it can be tempting to cut back on their naps. However, this is rarely the answer. In fact, cutting back on naps often makes sleep worse. This is because when we get over tired, our body produces extra cortisol to keep us going. Once this is in our system, it can be really hard to wind down.
Also, becoming overtired can actually affect the quality of sleep we have at night. If children fall asleep from being over tired, they often ‘crash’ straight into a deep sleep, rather than drifting gently through the early parts of the sleep cycle. When this happens, we often see frequent waking in the early part of the night, as well as early morning waking.
So, your first step to improving night time waking might be to work on the naps first. Don’t worry about the method. Use the pram, sling, cuddle or feed - whatever your child’s favourite way to sleep. If over tiredness has been an issue, focusing on helping your child get the appropriate naps during the day can make a big difference to the night that follows.
2) Too hot or cold
When Winter arrives, it’s tempting to crank up the heating up in the evening and wrap children up as warmly as possible for bed. However, being too hot at night can actually affect our ability to sleep. In order to fall asleep, our core body temperature needs to drop slightly, and if we are unable to do this, we can struggle to settle. The ideal room temperature is 18 degrees. In most UK homes, a child will be warm enough in an all-in-one and a gro-bag (or duvet for an older child).
However, being a little cold can also affect the night. If your child frequently wakes at around 4am, just check that they are not too cool. This is the time in the night when our core body temperature reaches it’s lowest point, and it’s often the time that our homes are at their coldest. Evidence shows that our feet regulate our core body temperature, and so wearing socks at night will help reduce early morning waking that is triggered by the drop in temperature.
3) Discomfort
Some children may be uncomfortable due to medical conditions such as reflux or eczema. If your child has eczema, the itchiness is likely to feel worse at night. This is because our levels of cortisol (a natural anti-inflammatory) drop naturally overnight. Support from a Registered Nutritionalist, Dietician or Naturopath may be beneficial in helping to improve the symptoms.
If your baby has been diagnosed with reflux, then offering small, frequent feeds, and keeping them upright for 30 minutes after each feed should help reduce the discomfort associated with laying down. It’s likely that your baby will fall asleep on you at least some of the time. Please don’t worry that you are building bad sleep habits - reflux is tough on everyone and you just need to do what works until it’s under control. If you need to help your baby learn to settle more independently later on down the line when the reflux has resolved, it can be done gently and gradually then.
4) A change in the external environment
Did you know that no-one actually sleep through the night? We have partial wake ups that occur between sleep cycles. From an evolutionary perspective, this trait has helped us survive our caveman days when we wouldn’t have survived a night if we didn’t have the chance to check our surroundings! As adults, we rouse at least a couple of times. We might check the time, pull our duvet up, roll over and go back to sleep. We probably won’t even remember it in the morning.
Children also go through these partial wake ups during the night. During these moments, they might notice that something has changed since they fell asleep. If something doesn’t feel right, your child may wake fully, and , they may call out for you (especially if they are used to having you close to help them settle).
If your child is waking every hour between sleep cycles, think about anything that might have changed since they feel asleep. Did they fall asleep with a sound machine playing, which has since turned off? Do what you can to ensure a consistent environment throughout the night.
5) Unable to self settle
It’s a myth that if your child is supported to sleep at the start of the night, that they will never sleep well at night. Plenty of children do. However, sometimes I see the pattern where children develop a particular sleep crutch, and they wake after every sleep cycle needing the same support throughout the night to get back to sleep. This can be exhausting for parents, especially where breast feeding or rocking is the crutch.
If you want to help your child move on from a particular sleep crutch, you can do this gently and gradually at a pace that feels right. When you make changes, introduce them at the start of the night first. This is when your child’s sleep drive will be at it’s peak, so this will be on your side! Once they’ve mastered it at the start of the night, it will be much easier to make the transition during the night.
I hope this blog has given you some things to think about and try. Give these tips a go, and let me know how you get on! If you have any questions, you can drop me a line at hello@sleepforall.co.uk.
Hi! I’m Louise…
I’m an infant sleep consultant. I’m based in the UK and support families across the world with children from newborn to 8 years of age.
I offer both online 1:1 sleep coaching support via Zoom (worldwide), as well as 3-day home visits (within the UK). If you’d like to feel more confident in helping your child sleep well without using cry it out techniques, I’d love to help you.
To get in touch, either send me an email, or click below to book your free 15 minute consultation today.